A Lady Ninja?
by taggerung0254
Summary: Something is wrong with Yuffie! She's acting strangly and no one seems to know why! Reeve sets out to find the problem and eliminate it! But what happens when he finds out the problem is what he himself has been avoiding?
1. Chapter 1

**Here's a new one! I've been super busy lately and not able to write a whole lot, but here is a new tidbit. I hope you enjoy it!**

**I don't own FF VII or any of her characters. **

Wutai was beautiful this time of year. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom and the entire place was filled with their scent. Rugs were hung out of windows and brooms were deployed with full force. Even the streets were being cleaned. People were chatting and children were running away with stolen honey cakes.

Reeve watched them run with amusement. He had often done the same thing when he was a child. Those memories were especially dear to him. They were a time when he had no worries and nothing but having fun to work on. It was difficult to believe he was even away from Midgar and his work. He had been cornered by Cloud and Cid in his office, demanding he go to Wutai with them.

_"Why?" _

_"Godo called, yelling about how something was wrong with Yuffie and that we needed to fix her." _

_"Fix her? What's wrong?" _

_"Dunno. Get out of that damn chair and we'll find out. You're closest to her, so you're coming." _

_"She hasn't spoken more than three sentences to me in the past two months." _

_"I don't give a shit, you're coming." _

So here he was, taking time away from his job to 'fix' whatever was wrong with Yuffie. He was exceedingly fond of the ninja, even if he had to keep a close watch on his materia when she was around. It had become a sort of game by this point in time, him hiding the materia and Yuffie finding it. Thus far, he had not won, but he would eventually. There would be a place he would hide the materia and she would never find it. _Now if only I can find that place, I'll be set._

"There's Staniv." Cloud pointed to a person walked toward them.

"I'm glad you've arrived so soon. We're all worried. Lord Godo is waiting."

They found Godo in a study, pacing furiously and muttering to himself. Lines creased his face where none had before, and the anxious look in his eyes made everyone uncomfortable.

"You're here! Good! Now you can fix her."

"Fix what, exactly?" Cloud said. He had never been one to ask questions delicately.

"I'll show you!" Godo went to a wall that held a giant mirror and pushed a piece of the frame. A door slid open beside the mirror. "Go in here and don't make a noise. You can watch through the mirror."

Reeve went through first. He felt a thrill at being in a situation from a mystery novel. The hero discovering a secret passage and a two way mirror. It was short lived, seeing as both Cloud and Cid were in there with him. Cloud settled against the wall opposite the mirror, arms crossed. Cid just stood with his arms crossed. Reeve stepped to the side, allowing Cloud a clear view of the room. He watched as Godo told Staniv to bring Yuffie to him.

Moments later, a young woman entered, bowing demurely at Godo. She was beautiful, dressed in a traditional kimono with exquisite embroidery. Her hair was pulled up in an elaborate style with many ornaments adorning it. Perfectly applied make-up completed the look. There was something tickling the back of Reeve's mind about the woman, something familiar.

"Yuffie." Reeve felt more than saw Cloud jump slightly in shock. Cid had eyes as wide as the tea cups Shera used.

"Yes, Father?"

_Father? When did she start calling Godo that? And what is she doing wearing that outfit and being obedient? _

"I've decided that it's time for you to marry. I'm looking into suitable husbands for you."

"I'd rather not marry, but if you wish it so, then I will not argue ."

"Good. That's all. On your way."

"Yes, Father." Yuffie left he room, taking delicate steps instead of her usual ground eating pace. They waited until Godo shut the study door before leaving the hidden room.

"Did you see that? THAT'S MY DAUGHTER! Being calm and obedient and dressing appropriately! She's even started doing embroidery again! She serves TEA! And now she's even agreed to an arranged marriage!" Godo's face was red with anger and he was nearly sputtering. "You're her friends! You find out what happened to my daughter and FIX IT!"

"When did this start?" Cloud asked.

"Two months ago, right?" Reeve said before Godo could answer.

"That's right. One day she just started being a proper daughter. Nearly gave me a heart attack when she served me tea...the only thing she's not doing right is living at her mother's house. It's hers, but an unmarried girl shouldn't live alone."

Two months ago, Yuffie had visited him. Something had been bothering her at the time, but he let it go when she said it was nothing for him to worry about. Now he regretted it. She had been happy to see him, even when he filled her shoes with jell-o in the middle of the night. She had hugged him after beating him up for doing it.

"Where's the house at? We'll go visit the brat and find out what the hell's the matter with her." Cid looked like he wanted to smoke an entire pack of cigarettes at the moment. He only did that when worried.

They got directions to Yuffie's house, and set off after their friend. Reeve was lagging behind the others, lost in thought.

_What in the world could happen to make Yuffie change so drastically? That girl bounces back from things that would break most people. But something broke her. It's not that she's dressing differently. The spark in her eyes is gone. She doesn't even bounce when she walks anymore. _

"Reeve, any ideas as to what happened?"

"Hmm?" He looked over at Cloud, startled out of his thoughts. "No, she was acting a bit strange the last time I saw her, but nothing comes to mind."

"Well, the brat better have a damn good reason for acting like this. Walking around being all lady-like."

"You say that like it's a bad thing, Cid." Cloud spared his companion a glace before going back to scanning his surroundings. It was a habit they all shared from their days fighting in AVALANCHE.

"It sure as hell is! That girl ain't a lady any more than I am!"

"You would look hideous in a dress, Cid. Might I recommend wearing a tutu instead?" Cid scowled at Reeve, which only made him chuckle. "All joking aside," Cid snorted but remained silent. "Why do you think Yuffie is not capable of being a lady?"

"Cause she's a bratty materia thief!"

"Oh, how I pity you, Cid, not noticing Yuffie's feminine qualities."

"I'm too busy making sure my materia stay put to notice anything, jackass!"

"Such a pity...she's an excellent cook and fights dirty in pillow fights."

"Probably burn everything in the damn house..." Cid went on muttering to himself.

"You get in pillow fights with her, Reeve?" Cloud had an actual expression on his face for once, one of shock. Reeve calmly and quickly pulled out a camera and snapped a photo of it. It was never too late to gain blackmail material. He waited until he put the camera away to answer.

"She stays with me when she visits Midgar. I thought you knew that."

"No, I didn't. That's a little inappropriate, don't you think?"

"Not at all. She has her own bedroom, and we plot about just how we can prove Vincent is a vampire after all. The only problem we keep running into is how he can walk around in daylight...he got slightly annoyed when we threw a garlic wreath around his neck when he came to visit once."

"I can imagine..."

"Wait, she's got her own room at your place, and the damn vampire's there too!" Cid said, once again joining the conversation.

"Oh, yes. Her own set of keys as well. As for Vincent, it's so much fun for him to come over and play."

"You know Reeve," Cloud said. "Somehow when you say that, it sounds illegal."

Reeve chuckled, but did not argue the point. It truly did sound illegal, but Yuffie was over eighteen and quite capable of defending herself. He had felt the evidence of that more than once in the form of bruises.

"Just what do you guys do together? Besides trying to prove Vincent is a vampire?"

"You ain't doing anything indecent, are you? I'll wring your neck if you took advantage of that brat's affection."

"Affection?"

"Oh, please. Yuffie fucking adores you. You're the one she runs to see and knocks you on your ass with a hug."

"Ah, I do love being glomped. I feel quite special for being the only recipiant of her glomps."

"You better not be getting anything else..."

"Are you insinuating something?"

"Maybe."

"Just making sure."

**So? Tell me what you think! **

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	2. Chapter 2

**Allo, and welcome! Here is the next chapter! I should really be sleeping right now but I wanted to post this before bed. I like this story. I think it really will be shorter than most of my others. There are a few plot-bunnies in the works, and more hilarity. I'm enjoying Reeve's personality a lot. More than I thought I would.**

**For all of you reading my other stories, I DO have updates for them, but they are in major need of editing. Look for them in the coming week or so! **

**I don't own FF VII or any of her characters. I just use them in my stories. Please don't sue me, I'm poor and need to eat. **

Yuffie's house was beautiful. An archway marked the beginning of a path that lead to the front doors. A manicured lawn and garden made its way around both sides of the building and behind it. The doors, bright red and adorned with gold coins hanging from the handle, were opened for them when they approached. A woman bowed them in, asking them to 'please follow me'.

Reeve removed his shoes before following. Cloud and Cid kept their boots on, most likely because it was a hassle to remove them. He could do without shoes. They irritated him more than anything else, especially when an itch developed on the sole of the foot and he could not reach it.

They were shown into a sitting room, and served tea as they waited for Yuffie to come to them. Cid grumbled to himself while Cloud remained silent, a gloomy expression on his face. Reeve frowned at that. The man had not wore that expression since before Sephiroth's resurrection. He was about to comment on it when a door slid open and all heads in the room turned to see who had entered.

"If I'd known you were going to visit, I'd have gotten rooms ready for you."

Yuffie stood before them, bowing slightly in a greeting. It unnerved Reeve to see the action from her. He rolled his shoulders slightly in an attempt to relax. It did not work. She was smiling at them, but it was empty of her usual happiness. Reeve rolled his shoulders once again.

"It was a last minute trip. Yuffie." Cloud said. "We hadn't heard from you in a while, so we came to see you."

"Cut the shit, Cloud. Brat, what the hell are you doing, acting like this? This ain't you."

"What's so wrong about behaving like I should?"

"It's just WRONG, Brat. You should be jumping up and down and stealing our materia and annoying us."

Reeve watched her face carefully, trying to find some hint as to why she had changed so dramatically. He caught an expression, one of sadness, before it was hidden by a false smile. Yuffie being sad was disturbing during any circumstance. Now it made his heart sink that she was hiding her sadness from her friends.

"That's not all I can do, Cid. I have other talents, you just never noticed."

"Whatever, Brat, but what the hell's wrong with you? We're not leaving til you tell us."

"Nothing's wrong with me."

_I've never heard a bigger lie come out of your mouth, Yuffie. What happened that you couldn't even tell ME about it? You used to tell me the most ridiculous stories and ideas about anything and everything, including a theory on just how tentacle rape in hentai came about. You even told me about the crush you had on Vincent years ago. About the man you were falling for that saw you as nothing but a friend. How can you tell me all that and not be able to share what's eating at your heart?_

"I'm surprised you managed to drag Reeve away from Midgar. What did you do to get him to come? Beat him over the head?"

"We told him something was wrong with you, you damn brat! Why would we have to hurt him to make him come see you?"

"Well, you dragged him here for nothing. You can drag yourselves back to where you came from."

Yuffie left the room with those words, Cid yelling obscenities at her through the door. Cloud was still frowning at the door.

"Why don't the two of you go on and go? I'll stay here and find out what our little ninja is up to."

"You so damn eager to be alone with her again, Reeve?"

"As a matter of fact, yes. I've heard there are wonderful little hiding places in the open air baths to spy on the women inside."

"I think...Reeve's right, Cid. She doesn't seem to want to tell us anything."

"What! You're going to let him stay here and SPY on her in the fucking tub?"

"Really, Cid, that's not at all what I meant." Cid settled down to simply glowering at him instead of ranting and glaring. "It will be so much easier to get answers out of her in bed." Cid's right eye twitched violently and the veins on his forehead popped out. Reeve looked on amused, one hand supporting his chin as he watched the pilot fume. "Especially after getting her to call me 'Master Reeve'." He made sure not to change his expression at all while speaking, and the effect it had on Cid was enough to keep him in Reeve's hands for the rest of his life. The man simply did not see the camera clicking away while he fumed.

"Knock it off, Reeve. You're not making him feel any better."

"I wasn't trying to make him feel better, Cloud. He's simply jealous that no one calls him 'Master'."

"You sick bastard! This is serious!" Cid seemed ready to clobber Reeve from across the table.

"I'm being perfectly serious. I'll stay here and take the brunt of Yuffie's anger and then sweet talk the reasons for her change in behavior out of her. I'm sure you'd much rather sleep with Shera tonight, Cid."

"So what? I'm supposed to leave her with a sicko like you?"

"She told you to leave, remember? She didn't say for me to go. I'll stay, you go home and play patty-cake with Shera while I get to the bottom of this. And her underwear drawer."

"WHAT!" Cloud and Cid said in unison.

"That's where she keeps her journal. That's bound to have some answers in it. Don't you think so?"

"You...you do something outta line, and I'll rip that beard of yours out hair by fucking hair."

"I'll keep that in mind. Now, I'll call you later on, let you know how things are going."

"Come on, Cid. Let's leave this to Reeve." Cid got up and walked back to the entrance while Cloud lingered a moment before speaking. "Seriously, Reeve, no plots or jokes. This isn't a game."

"I never said it was. I need to call my office and let them know I won't be in for a while. Take care." Reeve took out a phone, dialing quickly. "Yes, Miccha? I won't be in for a while. I've decided I need a vacation. Why? Oh, I've met the most enchanting woman. I think she'll turn out to be the love of my life. Yes, now all I have to do is wait for school to get out. I do love those uniforms they wear. One of my favorite fetishes. Yes, thank you, Miccha. Say hello to your son for me. Good bye."

"You...are a strange man."

"You're just figuring that out, Cloud?"

**YAY for Reeve and his apparent pervertedness! We'll see if it's real or not in the coming chapters! Review! Thanks a heap!**

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	3. Chapter 3

**Allo! New chapter! Enjoy!**

**I don't own FF VII or any of her characters. **

Reeve went in search of the woman that had served them tea earlier. He found her walking down a short hall, tea tray in hand. She seemed surprised to see him wandering around the house. He relieved her of the tray before she could ask any questions.

"I'll take this to Yuffie, if you would kindly direct me to her. You can get a room ready for me while she and I chat. Isn't that a wonderful idea? Hmm?" He made sure to smile gently at the woman.

"O-of course. Third room on the right. Thank you, sir. She has been acting so odd lately, I've been worried. She likes you a great deal, maybe you can bring Lady Yuffie back to us."

"I'll do what I can. Go on now."

"Yes, sir."

Reeve made his way to the third door on the right, and balanced the tray in one hand as he slid the door open. Yuffie was inside, her back to the door. She was staring at a garden through open doors that lead to a porch. The sunlight had turned golden, lending the garden an otherworldly beauty. Reeve was more concerned with looking at Yuffie than at the outside world.

Her posture was the same as it always had been, straight and proud. He could not bring himself to say she was straight and tall, seeing as she barely made it up to his shoulder. He did notice that she was standing with both legs together, instead of the weight on one leg. It was a stance only women could do. Men tried and failed at it miserably. Rufus came close to being able to do it, but he still looked ridiculous when trying.

"Thank you, Kisa. Just leave the tray here." Yuffie said, turning to face who she thought was her servant. Her eyes widened comically at seeing him holding her tea tray instead. They quickly narrowed into a glare. "I thought I told you to leave."

"You should know I'm not nearly as accommodating as Cloud and Cid."

"What do you want?" Yuffie had crossed her arms over her chest. That meant she was not entirely displeased he was there. That was a good sign.

"I decided to take a vacation."

"Costa del Sol is a place for vacations."

"I decided to take a vacation and spend some time with you."

"What? Now I know you're joking."

"Not at all." Reeve found a low table nearby and set the tray down with a quiet 'clink'. He made his way to the porch, looking out much as she had been doing when he entered. "I've missed you. My kitchen missed you too, but I couldn't bring that along with me." He heard Yuffie snort, then move over to stand next to him. She looked completely different, yet so similar to what he had always known. It bothered him more than he cared to admit to anyone.

"Figures you'd miss my cooking. You aren't eating take out everyday, are you?"

"Would it make you happy to hear 'no' as my answer?"

"Yes, but only if it was true."

"Then, yes, I do. I have no talent in the kitchen. You've seen the evidence of that in my one attempt to make breakfast for you. My toaster still hasn't forgiven me for that incident. I usually end up with a charred mass of what was once bread. I'm still alive, so a diet rich in carbon seems to agree with me a bit."

"You should take better care of yourself. A grown man like you should at least be able to make cardboard mac'n'cheese without incident." He smiled, turning to look at her. He found Yuffie frowning at him, worry creasing her brow.

"I think I'll leave cooking to you, little ninja." She smiled at the name he used, but she turned back to the garden before he could say anything. She stepped out in front of him slightly, a hand resting on one of the support poles.

"Like my garden, Reeve?"

"Yes."

"Me too." Reeve stayed silent. Yuffie could not stand silence, so she would soon fill it with words. It was one way of getting some information out of her. She let things slip that way. "What are you thinking?"

"That I'd like to prance about in a pink cape with a clown wig on." He could almost hear her eyes roll at his words.

"I'm being serious. And if you say you're being serious, I'll toss you out on the street."

"I'm thinking, about why you couldn't tell me what was bothering you two months ago. What's still bothering you." He took a step forward so that he was behind Yuffie directly. "I've kept all the secrets you've told me, no matter how tempting it is to tell Tifa that she drools over moogles with spiky hair in her dreams."

"I...don't know that I want you to know, Reeve."

"Very well. But beware, I don't intend to leave until I find out."

"Won't your work die without you?"

"Seriously maimed is more like it."

"You're really not leaving?"

"No. You're stuck with my company, for better or worse."

"Til death do we part?"

"At least minor discomfort." Yuffie turned around then, blinking at him without expression for a moment. She looked down at his arm for some reason, then linked her own arm through it, leading him back inside and to the front door. "Throwing me out already, Yuffie?"

"No, I need to go shopping for more needles and crimson thread."

"I'm invited along? How wonderful. I was going to go shopping myself later on. Seems I didn't pack enough for a long stay. We can go clothes shopping together."

"You always try to get me to wear fetish costumes."

"You look so fetching in them." Yuffie was waiting for him to finish with his shoes. She was wearing sandals so it took a minimum of time to put them on. "Besides, I'd like you to call me 'Master Reeve' wearing a maid's outfit."

"You are one sick puppy, you know that?"

"Yes. Shall we go? I'd like to get you fitted for that maid outfit at least. What do you think of heels to go with it? Or is that too over the top?"

"Too over the top."

**Ya, these are shorter chapters. It's refreshing to write something like this. **

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	4. Chapter 4

**And here we go with another chapter or Reeve and Yuffie! I've said it before and I'll say it again, I love Reeve's personality. He's so flexible, but you know he's a bit of a loon for making and using Cait Sith. You get a better glimpse of their relationship and where it 'supposedly' stands. So many plot-bunnies, so little time...**

**I don't own FF VII or any of her characters. **

Shopping with Yuffie turned out to be an event. Many people stared at him, the young men glaring in most cases, as they walked along. Reeve ignored it for the most part, as did Yuffie. That was surprising, considering she usually yelled at whoever was staring at her. She sighed and ignored them, once again walking with delicate steps. He had to slow his pace down so that she could keep up. It was pleasant, strolling with Yuffie on his arm.

Reeve made no attempts at jokes. He found that her polite smile saddened him, so he simply talked with her. A conversation with him was never without laughter, and the few times she giggled, he felt like a super-hero. Prancing about in a pink cape with a clown wig. The mental image made him chuckle. Yuffie looked up at him inquiringly.

"I was just imagining myself prancing about in a pink cape with a clown wig. Utterly ridiculous."

"Yes, but next time you get drunk, I'll be sure to have a camera ready to capture it."

"I'll make sure it's a costume party, so that you will be forced to wear something with as little clothing as possible, thus giving you no where to hide a camera."

"You and your obsession with costumes."

"With as little cloth as possible."

"Why do you keep trying to get me to wear one?"

"Because you look so wonderful in them. I could have dunked you in my coffee and eaten you when you wore that pixie costume for Halloween last year."

"If anyone else said that, I'd probably beat them."

"Now, now. That's not something a lady such as you should do! A lady should cry out 'PERVERT' and shriek as she runs away, lace hanky billowing behind her." Yuffie snorted at him.

"I don't have a lace hanky."

"Would you like to borrow mine?"

"I'm seriously pretending you didn't just say that and moving on to another subject." Reeve smiled slightly, intending on pursuing the subject, but was cut off before he could start. "This shop should have what you want."

They went inside, a bell chiming their entrance and were met by an older man, well dressed and with a measuring tape draped around his neck. He greeted them cordially, bowing low to Yuffie, who returned the gesture though not as deeply.

"How may I be of service?"

"Well, I seem to be at a loss of suitable clothing, so I was wondering if you had something in a bright green or turquoise. Paisley would do in a pinch if you have nothing else." The man's eyes tried to fall out of his head and he stuttered in shock.

"He's kidding." Yuffie said, and the man breathed a sigh of relief before cracking a smile. Reeve turned to her and pouted slightly.

"Yuffie, you ruin all my fun." She did not change her expression but turned her head at an angle while looking up at him. "Blue will do nicely, I think. But something colorful in ties. I'm heartily sick of black and blue ties."

"Very well, sir. This way." The man led Reeve to an area with three mirrors set at an angle to each other and had Reeve step up on a platform. He proceeded to take a great deal of measurements, some of them in 'sensitive' areas.

"Reeve, do all men act this calmly when getting their inseam measurement taken?"

"Hmm, yes I believe they do. A tailor has the complete trust of a man to take great care when measuring. If it's wrong, there are all kinds of things that could happen."

"Like what?"

"Well," Reeve paused as he stepped off the platform and loosened his tie. "There could be a horrible tightness in the crotch, which would lead to decided discomfort." Yuffie smiled but did not laugh. He could see the amusement in her eyes so he continued. "Either that or what is referred to as 'The Bulge' will take precedence over all else." This time Yuffie snickered loudly, turning her head away with her eyes closed. "The pant leg could be too short and people would begin expecting a flood...there are any number of things." He removed his tie completely, letting it hang in one hand as the other was fumbling with the top two collar buttons of his shirt.

"You should not wear a tie more often."

"I should?" Yuffie was once again giving him an expressionless face, but her eyes had some of their old light in them. "Does it make you happy to have me not wear a tie? If so, them the trend should be my removing my shirt will make you delirious."

"That's what the dressing room's for, Reeve."

"Oh, so you want to come in with me? How nice."

"I'm not going in there with you. It'd be too cramped."

"So if it were larger you would go in with me?"

"Sure, why not?" He turned and gave her a sharp look, noting that she had not changed expression at all. Yuffie had a wonderful poker face. He had lost to her in poker, along with the other Turks, a great deal. He did win a few times, about as many as she did, but he made sure the ante was higher than she did. Yuffie just wanted materia or money or odd favors like piggy-back rides around the Shinra office building while Rufus was there. He, on one occasion, demanded she wear a costume of some sort, her choosing, and come into his office with lunch or dinner and call him 'Master' for the day.

She had come skipping into his office, wearing a nurses outfit that belonged in the pages of a lingerie store and carrying a large white bag with a red cross on the side. He choked on the water he was drinking, spilling it on his shirt and tie at seeing her. There were several male heads peeking into his office by this point, all of them staring at Yuffie and wondering what was in the bag she carried.

_"Nurse Yuffie, reporting for duty, Master Reeve!" She said, sounding completely innocent, while saluting. She came over to his desk and set the bag down on top of his paperwork. Yuffie looked at him with laughter in her eyes and pressed a hand to his forehead to check for a fever while bending over, revealing a great deal more flesh than suitable in an office. The hem of the dress was barely long enough to reach the tops of the white thigh-high stockings she had on. Not to mention the low cut of the bodice. "Oh no! Master Reeve you have a fever! I have **just **the medicine to make you feel good." Several hushed exclamations came from outside his office at her words. Yuffie straightened and skipped over to the door. "Don't you worry, I'll take **great **care of him." She shut the door in their faces and waved before shutting the blinds. _

_"They'll be talking about this for weeks, you know." _

_"That's what you wanted, wasn't it?" _

_"Quite. Now, what's in the bag? I hope it's either lunch or a pair of handcuffs." _

_"Just the lunch." _

_"You couldn't bring both?" Reeve had sighed dejectedly but accepted the vastly over sized sandwich she handed him. "Next time, bring the handcuffs **with **the lunch." Yuffie laughed and started in on her sandwich. "I'm being serious." _

_"Eat your lunch." _

_"Yes, Nurse Yuffie." _

"Here we are, sir, try these on for size. And here are several different ties as well."

"Ah, wonderful. Let's see...oh you found a paisley tie!" Reeve said, inspecting what the man had brought him. "I absolutely must have that one." He took the offered clothes and went into the the dressing room. There was a muffled conversation going on outside but he could not hear it well enough to know what it was about. He stepped out, still finishing the knot in the tie and went to the three mirrors and their platform. "Wonderful cut, but a bit too long in the leg. I do love this tie as well. What do you think, Yuffie?"

"I think a pink tie suits you. Make sure you get matching pink socks."

"I hadn't considered that..." The tailor began to laugh nervously at the conversation. Reeve ignored his nervousness and went back into the dressing room. He found several suits to his taste along with matching shirts and ties. The tailor looked slightly upset when he asked about finding the matching pink socks for the pink tie.

"He's kidding again."

"Really, Yuffie, must you ruin ALL my fun?"

**GAWD I love Reeve. He's so FUN. Heh. Thanks for reading! **

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	5. Chapter 5

**YAY for another chapter! This one starts off a bit more serious than the others, but gets rather funny at the end. I've started getting things in motion here, so get ready! **

**I don't own FF VII or any of her characters. Nor do I own Barney or the Tele-tubbies. (Try to figure out why they are in this story at all...) One question in here is from a game called Zobmondo, which is FUN and HILARIOUS and you should buy it and try it with your friends. It had me in stitches when I read it. **

Nearly a week had passed, and Reeve was still unable to learn what was weighing down Yuffie's spirit and heart. Several times, she had seemed on the brink of saying something, something important, but she never did. Every time he thought she was opening up, Yuffie would close herself off again. It was frustrating to say the least.

Reeve was sitting on the back porch of Yuffie's house. Yuffie had gone to bed, at a most un-Yuffie like hour of eleven. He sighed heavily, attempting to clear his mind of unwelcome thoughts. He had spent years getting them to quietly sit in a corner of his mind and now they were once again fighting for a space in front.

..._RING!..._

"Hmm? Who would be calling me at this hour..." He smiled at the number he found blinking at him from his phone. He waited until it was the last ring before it went to his voice mail to answer. It was a habit that infuriated his friends, which was the precise reason he did it. "Hello, Vincent. To what do I owe the pleasure of conversation with you?"

_'How is Yuffie?'_

"Honestly, I don't know. I don't even know if I'm coming or going with her. It's like she's locked herself up and let this cardboard cut-out take her place. She does crack a joke with me, or tease me once in a while, but..."

_'I see.'_

"Do you? In all seriousness, I'm worried. I think she wants to tell me, but she can't quite make herself do it. It's like she's using whatever broke her as a shield so she won't have to deal with it."

_'Would you say it was what bothered her before?'_

"Yes. Definitely. I'd like to take whatever young fool that ignored her and make him do squat-jumps for a mile every day. Among other things."

_'Reeve, consider something.'_

"I always consider things. But go ahead."

_'Would it not be ironic if that 'young fool' turned out to be you?'_

"Me? How have I ignored Yuffie?"

_'Yuffie adores you. Yet you never return the affection the way she wished you would.'_

"**I** never returned her affection? Are you blind as well as forgetful in your old age? You know damn well..." Reeve paused to run a hand through his hair. "That I love that girl to pieces. She's the one who never returned affection. Not me."

_'You were not as forward as you could have been, Reeve." _

"I taught her to dance, and subsequently take her dancing at every opportunity. I take her to dinner, to amusement parks. I even hold her hair back when she throws up from the roller coasters. I walked around a shopping mall wearing a chocobo feathered hat for no other reason than because she wanted me to. I go and get a burger and milkshake at three in the morning when I have to be at work by seven. I flirt with her at every opportunity. How is this not forward? Most women get the hint by the fourth time you hold their hair back while losing the the contents of their stomach." He began searching his pockets, getting aggravated at the lack of success he was having in his search.

_'I thought you quite smoking.' _

"I did. It's a habit you fall back into when stressed. Sort of like you cross-dressing. Damn, it!"

_'I do not cross-dress.' _

"Shame, really. You would make a wonderful woman with those eyelashes of yours." Reeve gave up his search and sighed once again.

_'I shall ignore that comment. Back to the point. You are notorious for your teasing and tricks. What reason would Yuffie possibly have to think you were being serious?'_

"..."

_'Do you understand now?'_

"You're forgetting that she's never shown an ounce of interest."

_'If I understood her reasoning, we would not be having this conversation. For all her strength, Yuffie is very fragile. She is also young. The young protect themselves with their fears.'_

"Vincent," Reeve began rubbing his temples with one hand. "I've come to terms with the fact that Yuffie does not return my feelings for her. I don't appreciate you trying to get my hopes up."

_'I am the last person to give advice when it comes to love, Reeve, but all I asked you to do was consider it.'_

"Fine."

_'Very well. Have a good evening.'_

"You too. Don't get staked through the heart or anything."

_...click._

Reeve remained silent after putting his phone away, his hands absentmindedly searching for an imaginary pack of cigarettes. It was several minutes before he realized that Yuffie was sitting beside him, rubbing her eyes sleepily. He jumped a full two feet in the air without the use of his legs when he saw her. Yuffie just blinked at him, then turned her eyes to the moon-lit garden.

"You didn't start smoking again, did you?"

"What? No. Just a habit of looking for a pack."

"Tell me something."

"You have to tell me what you want to know before I know to tell you what you want to know." Once again, he could hear her eyes rolling. It made him chuckle.

"Which would you choose: great sex or great food?"

"Now, that question is unfair! How could anyone choose between them?"

"Pick one."

"Great food. I would rather deal with no great sex than be eternally craving great food." He heard a soft laugh from her. "My turn. Let's see...would you rather immerse yourself naked in a tub full of live roaches, or one with chewing tobacco spit that is three days old?"

"Oh GAWD! That's disgusting..." Yuffie's dramatic shudder nearly set him to laughing. "The roaches. At least no one already chewed them...I hate slobber..." She shuddered again. "Would you rather kill Barney or the Tele-tubbies?"

"I can't kill them both?"

"Nope." He spent several minutes deliberating before answering. "The Tele-tubbies. There are more of them. Hmm...would you rather get a bikini waxing done everyday, or never at all?"

"No brainer. Every day. Nothing's worse than excess body hair. I mean, you've seen enough porn to know that. Here's a good one. When was the last time you had a wet dream?"

"Ask something a little more embarrassing, why don't you?" Reeve gave her a smile while shaking his head. Yuffie had on her poker face, so there was no telling what she was thinking. "A year and a half ago. First time since I was fourteen."

"Really?" He nodded, transferring his gaze from her face to the garden. "What was it about that you had one for the first time in so long?"

"...I'm not sure I should tell you."

"I shouldn't have asked. Sorry."

"It was you. In that nurse outfit. The same day you wore it, actually."

"That's not funny, Reeve."

"Which is precisely the reason why I'm not laughing. Why do you seem surprised? I've always found you to be attractive." _ Vincent **did **say I should have been more straight forward. Hoo, boy. _"More than attractive, really. But you never seemed to show any interest in me that way, so I let it be."

"Reeve...I..."

"It's quite alright, Yuffie. I'm resigned to the fact that you don't-" He was silenced by Yuffie linking her arm through his, and her head on his shoulder. Reeve blinked at her hair for several moments before the thought process came back into effect.

"Why...wouldn't I find you attractive? You're a great man. You can dance and take me nice places, and you play with me..." He did his best not to laugh out loud at her words. "Let me rephrase that. You have fun with me." This time two laughs came out. "That still sounds bad..."

"I'm glad you realize that."

"Abrupt change of subject. Was it a good dream? The one about me?"

"Wonderful. It kind of had to be, didn't it?"

It started out with a simple 'heh', then gradually turned into snickers, then laughs and finally guffaws. They were both laughing so hard tears streamed down their faces. They laughed so hard it caused pain.

"I'm...sorry. I shouldn't laugh..._snicker_..."

"It's alright." Yuffie had collapsed against him, her head sliding down from his shoulder to his chest. She made no move to change position, so Reeve said nothing about it. "I'm just glad to hear you laugh like that again."

"I haven't been around you to laugh like that." She said, wiping tears from her eyes. "I really did miss you."

"Then why did you break contact with me like that? I would have come here to you if you wanted me here."

"I thought...I could get what I wanted by changing who I was."

"How so?"

"You heard what Cid said. They still think of me as a sixteen year old klepto. Never mind that I haven't stolen anyone's materia in years, or that I'm twenty. It's so irritating to be seen as someone I'm not anymore."

"Yes. I can understand that. They see me as nothing but a trickster."

"Their loss."

"Exactly. But I have one more question. You wouldn't happen to still have that nurse outfit, would you? I'd love to see you in it again."

"If I had on socks, I'd stuff one in your mouth."

"A gag? I didn't know you were so into bondage, Yuffie..."

**FLUFF-ish! Oh I can't wait for FLUFF with Yuffie and Reeve! XD Did you love it? Like it? Were you very 'meh' about it? Did you make the universal revolting expression at the roach/spit question? So disgusting...**

**Tagg**


	6. Chapter 6

**This one's a little longer than the rest, but funny and fluffy. There is a lot more adult humor and situations in this chapter, and will be from here on out. You have been warned. It's not like I write pure smut or anything. I could. I should do that, just for kicks. Heh. Hope you like it! Oh, and I've had this ready for over a week, but the site wouldn't upload it for some reason. meh. Anywho, it's working now and you get to read a chapter full of funness and joy! And sex and bacon. hehe.  
**

**I don't own FF VII or any of her characters. I just use them. **

Reeve woke up rather abruptly. The reason for this was a pillow repeatedly hitting him in the face, forcing him to wake up and deal with whatever situation was causing this distress. His eyes, bleary as there were with sleep, caught an image of gray eyes and black hair before he was blinded by a pillow. Reeve grabbed the pillow before it could be swept away for another attack, throwing it across the room. The only problem with this course of action was that his enemy had another pillow for backup.

There was only one thing to do in the situation: actually get out of bed and deal with his assailant before he was pummeled to death with a down pillow. He grabbed the second pillow, and made a half leap toward his opponent. Reeve managed to get a firm hold on a body and pulled it back into bed with him,struggling one handed with the blankets as the body squirmed in an effort to escape.

"Yuffie, dear, being beaten to death by a pillow is simply not a manly way to die. If you wish for my demise, as you clearly do, you could at least use a shovel."

"Harumph! Who said I wanted you to die a manly death?"

"A good point. Now, if you would kindly stop squirming around, I might be able to get back to sleep."

"HEY, HEY, HEY! I went through a lot of trouble to wake you up!" Yuffie struggled to turn around, so that she would be facing him, but met with no success. She was stuck with her back against Reeve's chest.

"I specifically remember telling you to stop your squirming. Or do you WANT to end up naked with me?"

"Um...yes?" Reeve opened his eyes to stare at the back of Yuffie's head for a moment.

"You shouldn't tease old men like me, Yuffie. It isn't very nice."

"I'm not teasing. But if you insist on my stopping squirming..."

"By all means, if that's what you want, I don't mind in the least."

"Nope, you told me to stop."

"I take it back."

"Nope. Your loss. Go back to sleep."

"Well, if that's how you want to play it...I DECLARE THAT YOU SHALL BE TICKLED! AHHH HAHAHAHAHA!"

Yuffie proceeded to use every trick she knew to escape Reeve and the tickling that he bestowed. None of the tricks worked, for Reeve was never one to give up in a fight and he kept a hold on her through sheer determination. Yuffie tended to get violent when tickled, so he made sure to keep himself in a safe position. He would make sure her back was facing him and have her as close as possible, keeping hands and arms away from her mouth, which would bite him if given the chance.

"Do you yield?" Reeve said, merciless in his tickling attack.

"Yes!"

"Say it properly!"

"I...I yield, Master Reeve! I yield!" She said breathlessly, head falling limp on a nearby pillow. "Gawd, you're so mean...Reeve. Tickling me like that."

"That is a fitting punishment for your flippant remarks earlier. It really isn't nice to tease-"

"You're not old, and I really wasn't teasing. Why do you think you're old?"

"I'm older than you." Reeve watched her eyes roll dramatically, and he chuckled. "Tell me something." Yuffie raised an eyebrow at the question.

"Like what?"

"Something I don't know about you."

"Let's see..." She looked at the ceiling, biting her lower lip slightly in thought. "Well, a few years ago I got my clit pierced."

"You did WHAT!" Reeve quickly pushed his body up on one hand, staring in shock at Yuffie, who was practically beneath him.

"I got my clit pierced."

"W-why? And why did I never hear about this?"

"Well, I just wanted to do something extreme, and I don't do the tattoo thing like Reno, so I got a piercing. I never told you," Yuffie made a show of adjusting the blankets, staring at them intently as she did so. "Because I really wanted you to find out about it on your own." She was blushing slightly, and it only got worse when she peeked up to see Reeve staring down at her. "Stop staring like that!"

"Is it a bar or a ring? Or do you want me to find out on my own this time?"

"GAWD, you're the only person that can make me blush." She rolled over, pulling the pillow over her face as she did so. "It's a ring. It has a little star charm made of diamond on it. I don't like the bars."

"Real diamond?"

"Yep. Only the best!" Yuffie squealed when Reeve removed the pillow from her face. He lifted her head gently and set it back down on the pillow. He laid down as well, pulling her back to him.

"Did you have it when you wore that nurse's outfit?"

"Yeah." She shifted slightly before leaning back against him. "I'd only had it for half a year, and I kept almost telling you about it, but I couldn't. I wasn't sure if you even liked that sort of thing."

"It depends on the size and the person. Some people just look ridiculous with such a piercing. It would be like me getting a Prince Albert." He felt Yuffie shudder.

"How can men STAND that? I cried when I got my piercing. It hurt. I couldn't walk right for days..."

"HA,HA,HA! I would have paid money to see that."

"See the piercing or me walking funny?"

"You walking funny. I should hope you would let me see it without a charge."

"Maybe, if you're nice to me. Come on, let's get breakfast! I'm hungry."

"If you insist. I was rather enjoying laying here with you."

"That doesn't make my stomach full, though."

"I don't see you making any move to get up."

"You're holding me in place, remember?"

"Good point. Let's stay here."

"Reeve, you know I get grumpy when I get hungry. Do you really want to deal with a grumpy Yuffie?"

"So long as you stay here with me." He felt Yuffie sigh, and then relax. He did the same, but he had to rearrange her hair so that it would not be in his face. _It would be so easy to fall back asleep. I wonder how she would try to wake me up, though. I don't fancy a kick to the groin. _He managed to stay in bed for another half hour before Yuffie insisted on getting breakfast. He complied with a sigh, allowing her to leave his bedroom. He stared at the door after she left, trying to convince himself to vacate the bed as she had. It took a great deal of mental encouragement but he did it, making it to the shower without too much difficulty.

Reeve followed his nose to the kitchen, where he found Yuffie flipping a pancake as he walked in still buttoning his shirt. She smiled a greeting at him, waving the spatula at the same time. It was a real smile, like she used to give him. It lifted his spirits considerably. He walked around the counter, eyes intent on the coffee maker and the large mugs next to it.

_Blessed caffeine. _He thought, taking a drink, and nearly burning his tongue in the process.

"I swear, you'd give away your most precious possession for a cup of coffee."

"Nonsense. I'd never give you away for anything. Well, maybe a cup of coffee with a danish." He turned, expecting a glare from Yuffie, but was met with a pancake full on the face. Reeve peeled it off, finding the idea of a pancake with a person's face on it highly amusing. He saw her move the spatula again, this time with a pancake on it. It slid onto a plate peacefully. "What an interesting kimono you have. I think it's a bit short though."

It looked like every other silk kimono Yuffie wore, only the bottom of it ended mid-thigh. It had a pattern of cherry blossoms on it, with a blue background.

"It's easy to move around in."

"I see. I think if you wore it outside, people might be scandalized."

"I'm not outside, and my other outfits covered less than this does. Why would they be scandalized?"

"It brings to mind the thought of how much easier it would be to take off of you than a regular kimono."

"You've never had to tie a sari. Easy to take off..."

"I would love to try."

"I just put this on. You're not taking it off." She said with a smile.

"Pity. Here, your coffee." Reeve handed her a mug, the coffee nearly white with the amount of cream she liked. "I may be helpless when it comes to cooking, but I am an expert at preparing coffee."

"You're expert at other things, Reeve."

"Oh?" He peered over her shoulder at the pancakes cooking on the griddle, one hand resting on her shoulder. Yuffie peered up at him, an amused smirk on her face. "What, pray tell, am I expert at?"

"Civil engineering. Planning. Robotics."

"Pish, posh. Name something useful."

"You make me happy."

"Now that, my dear, is worth more than the rest." He set his mug down next to Yuffie's as she slid the pancakes onto the plate. He turned back to face her, fully expecting another pancake on the face, but found Yuffie hugging him tightly. She had abandoned her spatula and breakfast preparations and instead tried to squeeze the life out of him. "What is it?" Yuffie shook her head, remaining silent. Reeve stroked her hair with the hand that was not holding her. "It has to be something. Tell me."

"I'm just glad you're here. That's all."

"I'm quite glad to be here as well, but that isn't he entire reason."

"Do you...think I'm pretty?" He blinked at the question.

"Yuffie, you're beautiful. I've always thought so."

"Really?" She sounded fearful and hopeful at the same time, making Reeve's heart clench. He moved the hand stroking her hair along her jaw, lifting her head by the chin. She blinked at him once before he kissed her. It was a brief kiss, lasting a few seconds, but they were a glorious few seconds for Reeve.

"Yes, really." Yuffie was silent, making him wonder if he had stepped over a line. "Or don't you believe me?"

"I believe you. I think." He laughed under his breath with relief.

"You sound like you need convincing, Yuffie."

Any reply she had was lost as he kissed her again. This time, Yuffie responded, inviting him into her mouth with her tongue. He let out a small groan, relishing the feeling of the kiss. It was much sweeter than he had imagined, and he was determined to enjoy it for as long as possible.

It was not until he heard the bell announcing a visitor that Reeve realized what was happening. Yuffie was no longer standing up. She was seated on the counter top, one of his legs between both her hers. He had one hand buried in her hair and the other around her waist. Her kimono had fallen off one shoulder, revealing a great deal of flesh. He was in the process of kissing and biting his way to her collarbone, which Yuffie was apparently enjoying. Her head was to the side, giving him easy access to her neck. She had one hand on his chest and the other around his neck.

He growled against her throat when the bell rang again.

"I'm going to kill whoever that is."

"Ignore it. Kisa's off today, and I'm not going to get it." Yuffie took the hand from his chest and used it to lift his head so she could kiss him. She knew what she was doing, and he became so absorbed in the way she kissed him he forgot about the person at the door.

-_Bang, bang- _"Yo, Yuffie, you home?"

"Why now? Why **right **this second?" Reeve said, his head falling to rest at the base of her neck in defeat. Yuffie laughed lightly, running a hand through his hair.

"Murphy's Law. It's okay, Reeve."

"No it's not. I was enjoying myself. And so were you."

"Then see if you can get rid of him." Reeve, who was more than reluctant to leave the kitchen, sighed heavily and slid away from her, but not before stroking her cheek gently with the back of his fingers. He went to the front door, silent out of habit and threw it open, revealing two men on the porch. "Reno. Rude. How **nice** to see you." He was glaring at them, a smile on his face that did not reach his eyes. He had one hand on the door and the other on the frame, blocking their way inside. Rude adjusted his tie at hearing Reeve's voice, and the look on his face made Reno 's hand twitch slightly for his Mag Rod.

"Uh, hey Reeve. Didn't know you were here. Bad timing?"

"Abominably."

"We interrupt anything interesting?"

"Breakfast. Coffee. What would have led to sex on the kitchen counter."

"The usual, huh? Mind if we join you for breakfast, then?" Reno smiled, thinking Reeve was joking.

"I do, actually. Why don't you come back, say, next week?"

"You're getting better at fooling people, yo. If you were anyone else with that expression, I'd think you were telling the truth or something." Reno said, walking forward like Reeve would get out of his way. He thought about simply knocking both of them out, but the neighbors would likely have hysterics at two unconscious bodies on Yuffie's doorstep.

"By all means, invite yourselves over for breakfast. I'm sure Yuffie will be delighted with your company." Reeve let them inside, keeping all the scenarios for their deaths in his mind. They followed him into the kitchen after taking their shoes off. "Yuffie, look who decided to pay a visit."

"Oh. Hey, guys! What brings you here?"

"We had a weekend off and decided to see what you were up to. You know, you don't need a watchdog if Reeve answers your door like that. Scared the shit outta me."

"Hmm. Then why didn't you run away?" Reeve asked, reclaiming his coffee mug from the counter and taking a sip. He winced at it, finding it room temperature. "Damn it, not only do these two clowns interrupt but my coffee has gotten cold..." He was about to dump it in the sink when Yuffie took the mug from his hand and replaced it with one full of hot, steaming coffee. His mood brightened significantly. "Yuffie, what would I do without you?"

"Spend your time getting fresh cups of coffee for all eternity, apparently. Is there enough sugar?"

"Yes. I would also be buried in take out boxes. Why not just live in Midgar with me? Then you don't have to worry about me eating right or wasting coffee."

"Alright. We'll leave whenever your vacation's over."

"Wonderful. Would you like to redecorate?"

"Sure. I'll have a blast while you spend your time at work."

"I'd help, you know. I'm quite good at household chores and painting."

"Great! It's settled." Yuffie began cooking bacon and more pancakes. The smell of breakfast quickly filled the kitchen, and it's occupants with devilish thoughts on how to devour their meal.

"You doing alright? Cloud keeps pestering us to see if either of you have called." Rude said. He rarely talked when on duty, but he was relatively chatty with friends after work. "He seemed worried."

"To think he has so little faith in me that he has to call the two of you. I shall have to talk with that young man." Reeve said, leaning on one of the counters.

"I'm fine. Spikey's being over-protective and nosy. That's all." Yuffie was piling the pancakes high on a plate and adding bacon to another. "Grab the syrup, Reeve? And utensils. Food time." Yuffie led the way into another room with a low table and cushions around it. Reeve came in with the syrup and both Reno and Rude had plates and utensils. They sat down, quickly starting their meal.

"You sure are a great cook, Yuffie. But why are a couple of these pancakes cold?" Reno said, a forkful of pancake halfway to his mouth.

"Reeve distracted me." Both Reno and Reeve paused, food almost at their mouths. Reno's bite of pancake fell from the fork as he stared at Reeve. Rude was staring too, but his forkful stayed put.

"You were serious, Reeve?" Reno asked, for once in his life not thinking everything was a joke.

"What made you think I was joking?" Reeve asked calmly. He kept from glaring at them by savoring the taste of his coffee.

"Shit, yo, why didn't you say something?"

"I did."

"What did you tell them, Reeve?" Yuffie asked, chewing on a bite of bacon. The rest of the bacon was in her fingers, waiting for it's chance to be eaten.

"Oh, that they had abominable timing and we were in the middle of foreplay in the kitchen."

"Oh. At least you didn't tell them about the table." Yuffie replied, completely unruffled and eating the last of her bacon.

"Yes."

"What about the table?" Rude asked. He and Reno both had their plates in hand, staring at the table as though it would bite them. Yuffie giggled at their faces while Reeve was taking multiple pictures of them as they gazed in horror at the table.

"Nothing happened on the table. I promise. You guys should see your faces..." They both set their plates down with relief and resumed eating. "It was just on the kitchen counter." They both stopped chewing. Reno looked ready to spit out what he was eating. Reeve was still clicking away with his camera. It was not every day Reno looked ready to vomit.

"What...happened on the kitchen counter?" Rude asked, seeing as Reno looked ready to throw up.

"Oh, nothing much." Reeve replied, sipping his coffee. "You banged on the door before anything involving bodily fluids could happen."

"Oh."

Reno and Rude hurried through the rest of the meal, almost running out of their shoes down the street. The minute they were out of sight, Yuffie and Reeve burst out laughing.

"I could almost forgive them for that scene at breakfast."

"Almost, Reeve?" Yuffie was beside him, locking the door.

"Almost. So, how shall we redecorate my apartment? Or would you like a new one? How about a condo?" Yuffie laughed, throwing her head back.

"I love your apartment, Reeve. And I was thinking of a yellow and purple paisley wallpaper in the living room."

"Well, it would match my new tie..."

**I liked it! I think Reeve is a blast. Such an under-rated character. I shall add him to my list of Cartoon Men I Love. **

**Tagg**


	7. Chapter 7

**The long awaited next chapter! There will be one more after this, so I hope you enjoyed this story! I loved writing it. I think I'll make a sequel to it! That'll be fun. Don't you think? This chapter has a very funny joke in it that makes me nearly pee my pants when I hear it. **

**I don't own FF VII or any of her characters. I just use them for my own devious little stories and no money is gained by it. **

"What the hell are you doing back here, Reeve! You're supposed to be in Wutai!" An irate Cid was leaning on Reeve's desk, attempting to look intimidating as the cigarette in his mouth was ground by his teeth. Cloud stood behind him, arms crossed and a slightly disapproving frown on his face.

"The problem was solved, so I'm back at work. I thought that was obvious."

"Then what was the problem?" Cloud asked, speaking for the first time.

"I don't think she would appreciate my telling you. You could ask her yourself, if you like." Reeve said, glancing at his watch. It was nearly one o'clock, which was lunchtime. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have lunch date."

"With who, Reeve?"

"It just so happens," He said, adjusting his tie before taking his coat from the back of his chair. "That I brought a girlfriend back with me from Wutai."

"WHAT!" Both Cloud and Cid were slack jawed with shock. Reeve took a few photos before putting his coat on and leaving his office. He watched his two friends run for the elevator he was in as the doors were closing. He chuckled all the way down to the ground floor. They came out of the other elevator just after him, looking ready to kill anyone that got in their way.

"You wait a minute, Reeve!" Cloud yelled, for once showing his anger plainly. "You go to Wutai, leave Yuffie there and bring back a girlfriend?"

"You fuckhead! If Yuffie finds out, she'll be a wreck!"

"What are you guys talking about?" Cloud and Cid both jumped at Yuffie's voice, and they found her taking the last step over to them, slipping her arm through one of Reeve's. Reeve smiled, laying a hand on top of hers in greeting. She was dressed normally, if a little more conservatively than before.

"They seem to think you'd be upset knowing I have a girlfriend, Yuffie."

"Why would that bother me?"

"I haven't the foggiest. Shall we go, then?" She nodded, and they started out the door when Cloud called out to them.

"Wait, you said you had a lunch date with your girlfriend. Why are you going with Yuffie?" Reeve and Yuffie both turned their heads to look at them. Then they looked at each other.

"They certainly are dense, aren't they?"

"Yep."

"You boys stay here and think about what Cloud just said. Okay?" With that they left the building arm in arm, happily chatting.

"What...do you think he means what I think he means?"

"How the hell would I know what you're thinking!" Cid exclaimed, kicking a nearby trashcan.

"Do you think...he meant to say that Yuffie was his girlfriend?"

"That's just ridicul- ...REEVE! I'M GUNNA KILL YOU YOU SON OF A B-" He stopped mid-sentence because of Cloud's hand over his mouth. He dragged Cid outside, trying to avoid a scene. Cid finally threw Cloud's hand off of his face when they reached the street corner. "What the hell's your problem?"

"Which way did they go?"

"I guess this way. I'm gunna break every single Cait Sith doll that bastard has."

They searched the nearby area for Reeve and Yuffie, looking in every restaurant they could find. Luck was not with them, however, seeing as they did not find any sign of either Reeve of Yuffie. Both men sat dejectedly on a park bench, watching children run back and forth in front of an ice cream stand.

"Where did they go? There aren't that many restaurants around here, yet they're no where to be found!"

"Those two disappear quicker than gil does. How the hell does Reeve think he'll get away with this? She's way too young for that sicko."

"She's twenty, Cid. She has been for a while. A whole year."

"I know that!" Cid proceeded to grumble under his breath about castration and tweezers while Cloud inched a little away from him. He went back to watching the children when something caught his eye. He hit Cid on the arm to get his attention, which only caused the man to hit him back.

"Look!" He whispered, pointing at the path directly across from them. Cid looked and almost jumped up. Cloud's arm kept him from doing so, but he still stared.

Yuffie and Reeve were there, walking down the path, each one with an ice cream cone. Reeve had his coat over one arm and his tie loosened. He never looked anything but crisp, so it was a slight shock to the watching men. Reeve said something that made Yuffie laugh and hit his shoulder. He said something else, pausing under a tree to say it. Yuffie smiled and reached a hand up to his face, pulling him down for a kiss. The arm that was not holding ice cream wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer.

"Shit..." Cid said, sighing in defeat. "She looks happy, doesn't she?"

"Yeah. I wonder...when this happened..."

"Damn it, were we the only ones that didn't know?" Cid kicked another trashcan, this time stubbing his toe on the steel cage that contained it. A few people turned to look at the man hopping around on one foot while the other one tried to look as though he didn't know him. "Call Tifa. Bet she knows all about this."

"Fine, just stop jumping around like an idiot and cursing. There are kids here." Cloud pulled out his phone, dialing Tifa's number. "And stop scowling. You scared that poor dog away."

"The hell do I care about some dog?" Cid grumbled under his breath, glaring at Cloud.

"Tifa? Hey, I've got a question..."

------later that evening------

"They sure are acting weird, Reeve. They told us to come to the bar like it was for an intervention or something."

"I wonder what the intervention would be for? I certainly hope they don't intend on getting rid of my addiction to you. That would be unforgivable."

"Seriously. I bet they're going to be all 'She's too young'. Idiots."

"It won't be that bad, Yuffie. If it comes to that, though, you can storm out in a huff and I'll berate them before running after my lady love."

"Okay." While the idea was funny, both Reeve and Yuffie knew it would probably come to that. Reeve opened the door for her, and they found the entire group from AVALANCHE there, some with drinks in hand and others just sitting around. Vincent was leaning back against a wall, staring at the floor. He looked up briefly when they entered and nodded a greeting at them. Yuffie waved happily at him. All the rest of the group were staring at them. "What are you staring at?"

"Yuffie...what's going on? Cloud and Cid said you and Reeve-" Tifa was cut off mid-sentence by Yuffie.

"Are doing the nasty? Playing hide the pickle?" Tifa blushed slightly, but continued.

"Reeve said he had a lunch date with his girlfriend and he went with you, so..."

"Oh, no, they caught us going out to lunch, Reeve! My reputation's ruined!" Yuffie buried her face in her hands, while Reeve laid a consoling hand on her shoulder. "What am I going to tell my dad?"

"I'm sure he'll come around after you explain that it was a safe lunch. We did use condiments, after all." Barrett burst out laughing at that, while Vincent snorted lightly. All the rest of them stared with jaws slack.

"I know, but he'll never think of me as his sweet, innocent little girl again! He'd be ashamed that I even know what a condiment is used for, let alone USED more than one!"

"There, there. I'll go with you when you tell him."

"Really?" Reeve nodded, a serious expression on his face. Yuffie hugged him tightly after that, surprising him and the rest of the room. "Oh, thank you!"

"Uh...when did this happen?" Tifa asked, unable to think of anything else to say.

"Does it matter? And why are all of you here like there was something wrong?" Yuffie left Reeve's arms to glare at her friends. "Oh, wait, let me guess, I'm just a kid who's going to end up stealing your materia before the day's over. That's what you think, right?" Several guilty looks were transferred to the floor. "I'm not a kid, I'm twenty. I know just about every dirty joke out there, I can curse worse than you, Cid, and I can probably drink Tifa under the table. I haven't stolen materia in years. If you bothered to think about me outside of the person I was when you met me you'd know that." Most of those in the room besides Vincent winced, knowing it was the truth. "If being with Reeve makes me happy, then what's the problem with it?"

"Nothing! It's just Reeve's such a joker, we wanted to make sure he wasn't fooling around."

"That hurts, Tifa." Reeve laid a hand on his chest as though is pained him. "To know you think so lowly of me..."

"I told you," Vincent said into the following silence. "That there was nothing wrong. Now if you will excuse me."

"Us too. We've got plans tonight. See you." Yuffie turned to leave, Reeve at her heels. He held the door open for her and let Vincent out as well. They were a block away from the bar before they spoke. "Gawd, what's their problem?"

"They were concerned for you." Vincent said.

"Yeah, well, you'd think they'd be a little supportive or something."

"They'll come around, Yuffie. Now, how about we get dinner and start painting? You're still joining us, aren't you Vincent?"

"Yes. So long as neither of you attempt to get paint on me."

"What's the problem? You've got one of your old dresses at the apartment, so why worry about getting paint on you?" Reeve received a very level stare and a snicker from Yuffie.

"I do not wear dresses, Reeve."

"Aw, but you'd make a pretty girl, Vinnie!"

"Why is it I put up with the two of you again?"

"Because we make you laugh."

"REEVE!" Cid was running down the street toward them. Reeve sighed and stopped walking, waiting for the man to reach them. "I wanna talk to you!"

"Whatever about, Cid? I know very well how to properly use a condiment."

"Listen to me, you jackass. You'd better..." Yuffie sighed and ignored them, turning to Vincent. They took a few steps over to a street light to wait out the 'Talk' Reeve was getting.

"I'm glad you let me teach you how to text message, Vinnie."

"Indeed. I am glad you were awake to get them. I would have been hard put to open your window and wake you without alerting Reeve."

"You're sneaky, Vinnie. But I'm glad."

"As am I. It worked, so that is all that matters."

"AND IF YOU GET HER PREGNANT I'LL SHOVE A STICK UP YOUR ASS SO HIGH YOU'LL SPIT MULCH FOR A YEAR! YOU HEAR ME!"

"Yes, is there anything else, Father-in-Law?"

"I'm serious, Reeve!"

"So am I. I'm through listening to you ramble on, Cid. Shut up." He turned to walk back to Yuffie and Vincent, taking Yuffie's hand as they started down the street.

"I'LL DROWN YOU IN TWO WEEK OLD DISHWATER IF YOU MAKE HER CRY! AND ANOTHER THING..."

"That man is giving me a headache..." Reeve said, rubbing his temple with the hand not holding onto Yuffie's. "Can't I just shoot him and get it over with?"

"No. He'll come around. Especially when he gets the condiment joke." He chuckled at that with Vincent. "But if he shows up for breakfast tomorrow without an invitation, feel free to pump him full of lead."

"Yes, dear."

**Awwww, Cid was threatening Reeve! What a caring man to be so concerned for Yuffie! Sorry this was so late getting to you, I was trying to fix the ending of it to my liking and we all know I'm very picky about that stuff.**

**Let me know what you think! **

**Tagg**


	8. Chapter 8

**This will be the last chapter of the story! There will be a sequel to it, so don't be too upset. Kay? I'm glad everyone enjoyed this so much. It's been such fun to write! Thank you for reading it! **

**I don't own FF VII or any of her characters. I just borrow them. **

"It's about time for lunch, sir."

"Yes, it is, isn't it Miccha? Are you going out?"

"Yes, I didn't have time this morning to make anything. Would you like me to bring you anything?"

"No, thank you. Yuffie said she was bringing me lunch today."

"If you don't mind my saying so, you've become much happier since getting together with her."

"Yes, that tends to happen when you love someone."

"When will you get married? She'd make a beautiful bride."

"Oh, well, I don't know. I'm deliriously happy right now, so I'll ask her later." Miccha narrowed her eyes at him. "What?"

"You've already bought a ring, haven't you?"

"Well, yes. But we haven't been together all that long so I don't want to scare her off."

"You've been together for over a year. Ask her! She'll say yes!"

"Calm down, Miccah, you'll fog up your glasses again." Reeve took the handful of papers from his assistant, leafing through them briefly. "You really think she'd say yes?"

"YES! I know she would!"

"Hmm, well w-"

-_knock, knock_-

"Come in." The office door opened, revealing half the staff staring at Yuffie. She smiled and waved at him, bouncing slightly. It was just enough to make her skirt lift up an inch or two. Considering the skirt was short to begin with, it was more than enough to make a few groans come from those watching. "Ah, did school let out early, today?"

"Yep! I brought you lunch!"

"I love that outfit, but if you really wore that to school, they would suspend you."

"Not if I flirt with the teachers!"

"You were flirting with teachers? I'm jealous."

"Awww, you're better than any old teacher, Reeve." Yuffie came into the room, dropping her backpack on top of his desk and sitting down next to it, swinging her legs. Reeve watched her legs swing for a moment, before noting the tassels on her knee high socks matched her skirt and the ties holding her hair in pigtails. Her shirt, while almost buttoned all the way up, held a haphazardly knotted tie.

"I should hope so. What's for lunch?"

"Subs and chips and a surprise dessert!"

"Oh, what's the surprise?"

"You want dessert first, then?" Yuffie had reached over and started playing with his tie earlier, and now she used it to pull him closer for a kiss. "We can do that." She hopped up, shutting the office door and the blinds, blocking the view inside from the hall. She came back to his desk, and straddled his legs, kissing him deeply. His hands automatically slid up her thighs, lifting the skirt higher than it already was.

"One of these days, you are going to get me in trouble. I won't wait until the door is shut and the blinds are pulled."

"That's one of my goals, after all."

"What are the others? One of them wouldn't include marrying me, would it?"

"It does."

"Then you'll marry me if I ask?"

"Yes."

"Then will you marry me?"

"Yes."

"I should give you your ring right about now."

"I'll get it later. I want your hands on me right now."

"Yes, ma'am."

**Short and sweet! I can't do the whole long ending thing, really. It's so hard to say goodbye to a story. Like letting go of a long time friend. Thanks for reading! **

**Taggy**


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